You are there.
Behind every disguise, you are there.
I feel you.
Why do you hide yourself?
********
A better question:
Why do I hide myself?
You are always there.
It's me who is not always there.
And yet we are the same.
There's not the slightest difference.
A mystery my mind cannot fathom.
And yet my heart does so easily.
Another mystery.
********
Why does my trust falter at times?
Because I, who am you, aren't paying attention.
I'm off with my mind and not with you.
And yet that's part of being human too,
This weaving back and forth.
Mysteries within mysteries.
********
I feel you.
You are within my heart.
Where else could you be?
(Except everywhere else.)
Help me to spread your light.
Help me to spread myself to myself.
More mystery.
********
The brain has 100 billion neurons,
The same number as the stars in the galaxy.
And as these neurons fire in patterns,
Their "light" winks on and off,
Like a dance of light in the Milky Way.
********
I can't fathom you.
At the depth of the darkest cave, there you are.
At the height of the tallest mountain, there you are.
Your ways are murky, deep,
And also bright and clear.
You are everything and nothing, aren't you, dear?
********
You're the spring in the springtime,
The falling leaves in the fall,
The white snows of winter,
The blue skies of summer,
The blue seas in my mind,
The falling thoughts like raindrops.
All is you.
Nothing is ever left out.
********
You are like the first kiss.
And the last before consciousness winks out,
As the last breath goes out
And comes in somewhere else.
You incarnate in a trillion differrent ways,
And reincarnate in a trillion different ways,
Like light in the whirling stars of the galaxy,
Like light in the neurons of our brains,
Like a lighthouse spotted at sea,
Like a lighthouse in our hearts,
Always nearby, indeed,
Always us. We are our own light,
Because there is no "we";
There's only you, dear.
********
I love your beautiful spring dress,
Millions of flowers,
No, billions of flowers,
Uncountable numbers of flowers,
Like sequins on your dress, dear,
Winking on and off as they catch the light.
********
I bow before you.
We bow before ourselves.
The mystery bows before the mystery.
The light bows before the light.
The heart bows before the heart,
And raises a glass to itself,
To you, dear. To us. To all of us everywhere,
We who are you,
We whose hearts are your heart,
We whose light is your light, our light, dear,
The light of the galaxy,
The light within your eyes,
The light within your heart,
Forever curling before itself,
Like waves at the seashore.
********
—jim sloman, 6/4/01 for Jun 4
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